Howls of laughter



Is she trying out for a part in ADDAMS FAMILY?



I was sitting on my perch yesterday, grooming myself like mad, fluffing my feathers, primping my fluff, smoothing myself down, cleaning and preening my head (no makeup of course, none of that horrible peacock stuff for me thank you very much, I am not a tart), when who should appear at the window, giggling hysterically as they are wont to do, peering in my direction as they did so but Nutella and Zoot, the bitches. I could hear them quite clearly, unbeknownst to them, as we birds have very acute hearing. I could hear things like “What on earth is SHE preening herself for? She hasn’t got a boyfriend OR a girlfriend?” and “Look at that head quivering away (howls of laughter), what does she think she’s doing?” They went on and on, asking themselves why I was alive? What my purpose in life is? What I could possibly contribute to this planet as all I ever do is sit on my perch and produce my pile? They even said that I was so useless that I didn’t even end up as someone’s pigeon pie with my sole purpose in life being to tingle somebody’s taste buds for a minute or two.

That got me thinking.  What IS my purpose in life? Why am I here? Just to live and die without making an impact on the universe? I am born, I live, I eat, I develop my pile, I get sick sometimes, I get better, I talk to others occasionally (contrary to what the freaks across the road think) and I have even had a fling or two. Yes, I do attract the occasional admirer as you may remember some time back with the sparrow incident. I am not a total waste of time am I.

But those two have spoilt my mood. I was quite happy going about my business, taking care of my appearance and just generally enjoying life when they rudely jolted me into “why am I here?” frame of mind. Why AM I here? Am I just a pretty face, to be admired by the occasional passerby? Am I just a bundle of flesh and feathers occupying space in this limitless universe? If the universe is limitless then isn’t my size relative anyway? I am as big as I want and as small as I want. If I suddenly invented something that was invaluable to the planet does that make my life more important than if I hadn’t invented anything? If I become a famous singer or actor am I more worthy than if I don’t? If I lie in bed all day long and do absolutely nothing, does that make me worse, in the end, than if I slave away as some endless task, day in, day out until I die. I don’t know. You tell me. Write me comments and tell me if my life is worthless or not!